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Sunday, June 30, 2013

Weekend Writing Warriors: Abuse in Prisons

Welcome to Weekend Writing Warriors.  My sample today picks up where I left off last week, at the prison.  If you've just joined me, Prince Alan's father sentenced him to a year in prison because he refused to wed a woman of his father's choosing.  The prince has just arrived and is speaking to the keeper, the warden at the prison.  The keeper has just asked Prince Alan why he had not trained as a warrior.  Prince Alan is answering his question.  When you finish here, please go on over to http://www.wewriwa.com and find other lovely sentences from participating authors.

blurb:

Forced by his father into a marriage he didn’t want, Prince Alan soon finds that his bride isn’t the sweet, submissive creature he expected.  Morgane has the heart of a dragon and beauty beyond compare, but she isn’t thrilled about the marriage either.  When black treachery threatens the kingdom, Morgane and Alan embark on a perilous journey that has an excellent chance of ending in failure and death for them and all of their people.  
 
Excerpt:

"My father had my brother. He had no use for me because I


liked to paint."
 


Kynthelig stepped forward and struck the prince across the


face. A black stone in his elaborate gold ring scratched a thin red


line across Alan's cheek. "You were told to address me as Keeper


Kynthelig."
 


The prince's eyes flashed. "Yes, Keeper Kynthelig."
 

ʺThat is better."

The Enchanted is available at most online retail outlets and will be in print soon.


 
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15 comments:

  1. S.J. MayleeJune 30, 2013 at 10:18 AM

    Ouch! The poor prince. :(

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  2. Karen de LangeJune 30, 2013 at 10:40 AM

    From prince to abused prisoner - that's quite a way to fall. I wonder what he'll do about it?

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  3. Veronica ScottJune 30, 2013 at 11:49 AM

    When he eventually comes to the throne, certain people had probably better watch out. Intense excerpt!

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  4. AnonymousJune 30, 2013 at 12:11 PM

    Foreshadowing with flashing eyes of the prince. I love it. Thanks, Elaine

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  5. sueJune 30, 2013 at 12:27 PM

    I wonder if the price will survive prison..

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  6. LaurenJune 30, 2013 at 12:49 PM

    excellent snippet! I actually winced when the ring cut him!

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  7. Susan StuckeyJune 30, 2013 at 1:20 PM

    Lovely snippet. I really feel sorry for the Prince - it is not going to be a pleasant year. Only nit/question I had was about the stone in the ring cutting the cheek - that would mean that if the warden happened to bump it against his own face or a part of his body it would also cause damange--just a thought

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  8. Susan SchilerJune 30, 2013 at 1:37 PM

    Nothing worse than a father-son relationship running amuck in political intrigue... but perhaps there will be a break-out? I hope Alan gets to find true love... great story line here!

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  9. Carrie-AnneJune 30, 2013 at 4:13 PM

    I hope he can survive this year in prison!

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  10. gemma parkesJune 30, 2013 at 4:28 PM

    How humiliating! I feel sorry for him too!

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  11. Teresa CypherJune 30, 2013 at 4:36 PM

    This scene is so well-written, Elaine. When I read it, I knew he was in deep kimchi! Good book. :-)

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  12. Elyzabeth M. VaLeyJuly 1, 2013 at 12:45 PM

    Poor Alan, his life just keeps getting worse with each snippet :-(

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  13. AnonymousJuly 1, 2013 at 5:00 PM

    He's in for it now.

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  14. LindaJuly 5, 2013 at 12:21 AM

    Damn, I thought Kynthelig was better than the King but apparently not.

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  15. LindaJuly 5, 2013 at 12:21 AM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

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