Sunday, March 17, 2013

Weekend Writing Warriors: Terrorists? Drug Dealers?

Welcome to Weekend Writing Warriors. Today's excerpt is from the same untitled work I've been using for the past two weeks. To recap, my heroine returns from heeding nature's call to save my hero from being bitten by a bat. Things happen. They misbehave together. That's where today's excerpt starts.


David saw them first. His could still feel his heart pounding in his chest when five scruffy, bearded men dressed in military fatigues melted out of the trees in front of him. He struggled to get to his feet, but with Phaedra wrapped around him the men were on them before he could get up.

They grabbed Phaedra and jerked her away while she alternated between ineffectual efforts to either cover herself or break free. With a roar, David lashed out with his foot and kicked the man who had grabbed his arm. The blow caught the man in an extremely tender spot. He immediately let David go and fell to the ground. Momentarily free, David plunged after Phaedra. 

Find more super snippets here. 
Photo Credit:

38 comments:

  1. Oh, I love that he fights back! Nothing sexier than a man willing to fight for his lady. Intense snippet!

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  2. Powerful scene, Elaine.

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  3. I'm loving these snippets, but I kinda wish you hadn't skipped the part about when they misbehaved. ;-)

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  4. Wow, tough situation! I'm glad to see she tries to fight and that he's protective...can't wait for more! Terrific snippet...

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  5. Awesome scene, has a lot of power and protectiveness. Loved it. :-)

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  6. Exciting snippet, l hope they get away!

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  7. love the word "misbehave" they're certainly having an exciting day with one thing and another

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  8. Nice. Clear writing, keeps the action moving.

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  9. Exciting, terrifying, and everything in between! Awesome eight, Elaine!

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  10. Loving all the action!

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  11. It isn't just nature you need to watch out for in today's jungles.

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  12. Great snippet! Very exciting. Go David!

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  13. Always something. If it's not a bat, it's armed guerillas. Unless I'm wrong and they're something else entirely. Great eight!

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  14. Whew, great scene. I loved the way the men "melted out of the trees." Excellent 8!

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  15. What an action filled scene! And such unfortunate timing! Can't wait for next week. :)

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  16. Love this scene, and the photo you posted to go with it. I'm glad that he uses his freedom -- however brief -- to help her.

    Excellent work :)

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  17. Great action snippet. I could picture it all.

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  18. This is in intense snippet, Elaine. :)

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  19. What a great scene! Seems like there's something going on all the time here and I can't wait to read the next instalment.

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  20. Nothing like a good fight scene. Good snippet!

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  21. well...certainly is a different aftermath for "misbehaven" than either having a drink or lighting a cigarette.

    Interesting, attention getting 8Sentence. Nicely done :-)

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  22. Yeah I love that he goes right after the men, even knowing they're military. Strong visuals and emotions, nice job.

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  23. Love the action in this. Well done!

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  24. Intense, action scene here. Automatically invests the reader!

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  25. Loved the action. Very intense.

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  26. Terrifying scene. Great sense of movement.

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  27. He's outnumbered, but still willing to fight back.
    Good luck dude.
    Nice 8!

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  28. "melting out of the trees"- Love that!

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  29. Misbehaved, huh? Not a good time to get caught by terrorists. Hope the boot to the private parts works.

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  30. Nice post, Elaine! Caught "misbehaving" but his instinct to save her came back quickly enough. I hope you continue here next week !! :-)

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  31. Uh-oh.... Really nice surprise attack tension building. I especially love the "melting out og the trees" line, so scary...!

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  32. Oh! Was the tender spot THE tender spot? If it was, ouch! Great fight scene there.

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  33. Oh no, they're in trouble for sure! Great angsty snippet, Elaine!

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  34. I loved the description of the soldiers "melting" out of the jungle. What a scary situation they've been plunged into!

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  35. Oh, no. That is the interruption to end all interruptions. Great and scary action, Elaine!

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