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Sunday, July 28, 2013

Weekend Writing Warriors: Going Home

Welcome to Weekend Writing Warriors.  My sample today is from The Enchanted.  I've skipped a few paragraphs, but we are still on the scene where my hero's father-the-king comes to collect Prince Alan from prison.  When you are finished here you can find more lovely sentences at http://www.wewriwa.com

Blurb:


Excerpt:

The clanking of heavy chains announced Alan's arrival. The

king set his silver cup down and beheld his son for the first time in

a year. "I almost did not recognize him. He is filthy, and his hair is

disgracefully short, but he has certainly put on a lot of muscle."
 

Kynthelig inclined his head. "Indeed."
 

The keeper's servant brandished a fan made of fluffy white

feathers and fanned King Bowdyn as he looked Alan up and down.

"He looks as if he has worked often in the sun."

Buy link: http://www.kobobooks.com/ebook/The-Enchanted/book-tpsgacO2mEmDbmmXGbGwHA/page1.html?s=tuDO4VjSF0SsYfNrz16vXg&r=3
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18 comments:

  1. UnknownJuly 28, 2013 at 9:02 AM

    Great excerpt, Elaine! Love the descriptions throughout, like the heavy chains and the feathery fan. Well done! :)

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  2. Karen de LangeJuly 28, 2013 at 10:14 AM

    Great excerpt - you paint a very vivid picture of Alan and the state he's in!

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  3. Joanne StewartJuly 28, 2013 at 10:26 AM

    Lovely descriptions of him. I agree--you paint a vivid picture.

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  4. Debbie D. July 28, 2013 at 10:50 AM

    Yes, I too enjoyed this descriptive passage and can picture Alan in my mind. :-)

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  5. AnonymousJuly 28, 2013 at 11:00 AM

    You paint quite a ontrasting picture; the battered son and the cold king. Wonderful eight. Thanks, Elaine. I posted but didn't make the list. Please check my website.
    7/28/13 WEWRIWA wp.me/p2froP-15g via

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  6. S.J. MayleeJuly 28, 2013 at 11:34 AM

    Love the descriptions and the changes in Alan. I have a lovely image in my mind. :) I'm worried about him though. I need more.

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  7. UnknownJuly 28, 2013 at 1:16 PM

    Great description, Elaine. He sounds yummy! :)

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  8. LaurenJuly 28, 2013 at 1:28 PM

    Poor Alan, thank heavens he's out of prison, but I must admit, I don't mind the idea of him being more muscled and tanned from the work in the sun LOL.

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  9. sueJuly 28, 2013 at 1:59 PM

    worked in the sun - for shame!

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  10. UnknownJuly 28, 2013 at 2:37 PM

    Love how the king's criticism of Alan only makes him more appealing.

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  11. Veronica ScottJuly 28, 2013 at 3:23 PM

    I think it's going to be VERY interesting what other changes there are to Prince Alan. Excellent excerpt!

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  12. Sue Ann BowlingJuly 28, 2013 at 3:40 PM

    Somehow I don't think the changes are what the king was hoping for. Or would have hoped for if he'd been thinking.

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  13. Susan StuckeyJuly 28, 2013 at 4:16 PM

    I can truthfully say I DO NOT like the King. Nice snippet! Good job.

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  14. Susan SchilerJuly 28, 2013 at 5:06 PM

    Yes, I agree with Susan... I don't like the King either. Really, a year without seeing his son??

    It makes me want to cheer for Alan, all the more!

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  15. gemma parkesJuly 28, 2013 at 6:46 PM

    Great descriptions for describing the change in his appearance! Welcome back Alan!

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  16. Teresa CypherJuly 28, 2013 at 9:18 PM

    Such a great visual, Elaine. And I don't think I've mentioned how much I like your name choices. :-) Great 8! :-)

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  17. Sarah WJuly 29, 2013 at 8:50 PM

    The comparison between Alan and his pampered father is striking.

    I wonder if the King had to go through a year like this?

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  18. AnonymousAugust 1, 2013 at 4:43 PM

    Some lovely details there.

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