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Saturday, September 10, 2011

Sweet Saturday Sample

This sample is from a short story that I wrote.  I don't like to write short stories, but sometimes I have.  The name of the story is Coincidence in Beave Creek.

“Gah!” Marnie yelled as she stumbled on the rough dirt road. She squinted against the sun that had broiled her for the last hour. She’d look like a lobster fresh from the pot if she didn’t get out of the sun soon.

She blew a breath of air through her mouth toward her forehead. It briefly lifted her blonde bangs which had totally plastered themselves to her head. Sweat poured from ever pore on her body. Each step she took stirred up little dust devils that threatened to choke her.
Rounding a sharp curve, she saw a white house at the end of the road. Finally-a way out of this grassy wilderness! A door slammed, and a man came out of a neatly painted white barn.  The man hadn’t seen her yet. She watched as he stripped off his tee shirt and wiped his face and upper back. Muscles rippled in his chest and arms, and as he swept off his hat the sun gleamed on his dark hair, turning it as shiny as a blackbird’s wing.

He looked around and saw her, and she raised her hand in greeting. “Hello,” she called.

He put his hat on and came to meet her. At five nine she towered over lots of women, but this guy made her seem petite. He had to be six four at least, and… Oh. My. Goodness. Look at the definition of the muscles in his chest and shoulders.

Her nostrils flared; he smelled of sweat, hay, and motor oil, not an unpleasing combination. She liked his eyes too. They reminded her of the sky right before darkness fell, full of depth and mystery, hinting of the unknown and making a girl long to plumb those depths. She liked his face too. It wasn’t classically handsome, it was too rugged for that, but the angles and planes she saw there gave her a few-okay a lot of-butterflies in her stomach.

“Can I help you?” he asked.

Nice voice. It sounded smooth and rich in her ears. “I was hoping to use your phone. My car broke down up on the main road, and my cell phone’s dead. I waited for awhile, but nobody drove by so I started walking.”

If you liked what you read, go to and finish the rest of it for free.


PhyllisC said...

Thanks for the freebie! I always enjoy your stories.

Jean said...

Great story, Elaine. I'd love to read the rest. Your descriptions are terrific, as always. Love the "shiny as a blackbird's wing" about his hair.
Loved it.

Patricia Preston said...

Sounds like a terrific read!

Elaine Cantrell said...

Ladies, thank you so much for coming by. I hope you all enjoy the story.