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Sunday, March 24, 2013

Weekend Writing Warriors: Prisoners

Welcome to Weekend Writing Warriors. My poor hero and heroine in this yet untitled work have had a dreadful time while lost in the Amazon rain forest. Last week they had just finished 'misbehaving' together when men wearing fatigues grabbed them. I'm picking up exactly where I left off last week.

 
He felt a blow to the back of his neck that sent a shower of sparks falling across his vision and knocked him to the ground.  A booted foot met his ribs a second later. 

Two men hauled him to his feet and dragged him over to the man who seemed to be in charge.  “What are you going to do, Rafael?” the one who had kicked David asked.

“I think we should all have a turn with the woman,” a burly man with only one eye said as he leered at Phaedra who now stood defiantly naked before them.
 
“We shall see,” Rafael muttered, his glance flicking across Phaedra.  “First I want to know who

 they are and why they are here.”  He pointed at David.


Find more great snippets here.

Picture: http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/Trees_and_Shrubs_g75-Rain_Forest_p35951.html

28 comments:

The Original Drama Mama said...

This snippet tells me more about Phaedra than anything else...if I was caught naked with a bunch of thugs, I don't think I'd be able to stand defiantly! I hope her attitude wins her some respect from the leader.

Jenna said...

They are in for a truckload of misery it seems. I'm just hoping David or Phaedre one figures a way out of this. Can't wait to find out if they do. I'm on the edge of my seat over this one!

Owllady said...

Wow, this scene just keeps getting more tense. Sure hope nothing awful happens to Phaedra (well and David too!)

Veronica Scott said...

Your heroine sure has guts...This scene just keeps getting more intense with each snippet!

charmainegordon author said...

Terrific eight and scary, Elaine. I admire the couple and wonder what happens next.

sue said...

burly man with one eye - great detail

Brenda Ashworth Barry said...

How brave can she be. Wow! not sure I could handle it that well. Great job and very good cliff hanger. :-)

Debbie Doglady said...

Phaedra seems very brave! This is fraught with suspense and I'm looking forward to the next instalment.

Shannyn Schroeder said...

Great suspense, but I think if I kept reading, it would be with one hand over my eyes. The idea that they would take turns with her is horrible (realistic, but horrible). I love that she's not showing her fear

Clare Davidson said...

I love the description of the "shower of sparks" falling across his vision. Lovely. Phaedra is one plucky woman to be able to remain defiant, despite the situation. I hope they manage to find a way out of their predicament.

Ute Carbone said...

I love Phaedra's pluck in this very tense situation. I hope that she and David will prevail.

S. J. Maylee said...

I'm loving the intensity of your snippet. It pulled me right in.

Sue Ann Bowling said...

Pluck or shock? That's one scary situation.

Sarah W said...

Yikes! Well, at least the interrogation will give them some time to figure a way out!

karen Y. bynum said...

Ooo, intense! Great 8!

Evelyn Jules said...

Eep! I'm scared for them! Can't wait to find out what happens next!

Kate said...

I'm glad the guy in charge isn't jumping on the rape bandwagon. Hopefully they can get out of this without too much damage.

Joanne Stewart said...

Gulp. You've got me by the throat here, Elaine. Excellent snippet. Very tense. I hope they get out that!

Paula Martin said...

Intense scene. Wonder how they're going to get out of this situation.

Siobhan Muir said...

Great snippet, Elaine. You could change "He felt a blow to the back of his neck that sent a shower of sparks falling across his vision and knocked him to the ground." to "A blow to the back of his head sent a shower of sparks across his vision and knocked him to the ground." It tightens the writing and makes us more present in his problems. I'm nervous for both of them. :)

Vivien Dean said...

Great build of tension. Well done!

Elaine Cantrell said...

Siobhan, you're right! Thanks. And thanks to everyone else who commented as well.

History Sleuth said...

A very bad situation here! I wonder if what David says will affect what they decide to do? I'll be back. :)

Teresa Cypher said...

It looks bad for them. Wow! Great action writing, Elaine :-)

Stephanie Burkhart said...

Elaine, I love how the action flows. A very suspenseful snippet!

Smiles
Steph

Jennifer Gravely said...

Great action and suspense.

Elyzabeth M. VaLey said...

What a tense moment! Phaedra is incredibly brave. I'd be freaked out in a situation like that. Hopefully, David has a good reason for them being there...?

Sarah Ballance said...

This is so frightening. Great job with the tension here, Elaine!