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Sunday, March 3, 2013

Weekend Writing Warriors: Snakebite on the Butt

Welcome to Weekend Writing Warriors. Thanks so much for reading my sample.  Today's excerpt is from a yet unnamed manuscript that's waiting on revision.  My hero and heroine are stranded in the Brazilian rain forest. My heroine awakes in the night in need of a bit of privacy for herself.


If only she had a flashlight!  She tiptoed away from the fire and stamped her feet on the back side of a tree that she barely missed running into.  It would be just her luck to squat down and get a snakebite on her butt.  She could just see David cutting the fang marks with his pocket knife and sucking the poison out. 

Oh, yuck, yuck.  She’d rather die.  But wait.  Didn’t boas squeeze you to death?
 

32 comments:

  1. hahaha. Cute moment. I like how you took a very real fear and twisted humor into it.

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  2. Terrific and a scary moment. Good eight with no END of possibilities.

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  3. I really like this story. Love the adventure and romance.

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  4. Haha, I love it!! I hope you post more from this story in the coming weeks! I have had to "go" in the backcountry quite a few times and the fear of snakebite is a very real fear ... almost as bad as the fear of squatting near some poison ivy ... :-)

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  5. LOL Poor thing! Yeah, that would be my luck too :P Great 8!

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  6. lol, excellent, Elaine! I think the thought has crossed nearly everyone's mind who has ever had to squat in the wilderness while roughing it. :-)

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  7. I love how the one snake fear is replaced with the other. She's right about the boas, they aren't called constrictors for nothing. Cute snippet.

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  8. Elaine,

    I had to chuckle. What a wonderful scene. We have the character's fear of the unknown, her possible attraction to the hero, and a wee bit of humor, too. Loved it.

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  9. Great scene, and one we can all relate to!

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  10. Oh, fun! Love this look into her thoughts!

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  11. I can just imagine the snake bite on the butt! Good imagery and leaves me wanting to know more.

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  12. There's more here than meets the eye... Great 8!

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  13. Boas certainly do squeeze you to death, so why...? There's a lot of story in these 8 sentences. Really effective hook! Super!

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  14. I loved the Yuck, yuck, she'd rather die. Too funny and very natural. Great scene.

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  15. the outdoors ain't always so great lol - excellent descriptions

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  16. OK MY worst fear - snakes! I totally sympathize with your character...excellent excerpt!

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  17. Yes, yes, they do. Fun snippet, Elaine. :)

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  18. Great snippet. Loved her last thought. I would have been worried about giant spiders myself. I hope you post more of this. I want to see what kind of trouble she's going to get into.

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  19. Oh, funny and not funny at the same time! Thanks for sharing this bit.

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  20. Oh, no, no. I would hate to be stuck in a rainforest. Humidity does awful things to my hair, and the spiders are huge! *shivers* But yes, the snakes would also creep me out. I've only had to deal with garden snakes and even then, I squealed like the girl that I am :)
    I really enjoyed this. I already get a sense of her personality within this short snippet. I can't wait to read more :)

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  21. Love this! Dying of snakebite versus dying of embarrassment. There's a tough choice! :D

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  22. Oh, funny, but very real concern. Love your snippet for telling us so much in so few words.


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  23. I like how her thoughts turn to one snake to another in just the blink of an eye. Yikes, I think I'd we tmyself rather than go out in the dark!

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  24. The last line made me laugh. I enjoyed reading about her thoughts, nice 8.

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  25. Love how the heroine's thoughts were amusing, despite her dire situation. Nice touch.

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  26. Oh, I really like this excerpt. It's cute and funny. :)

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  27. I'm massively frightened by snakes. What an awesome setting for a romantic adventure!!

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  28. LOL! I love that you even address this issue, but that you do it with such humor is awesome!

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