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Saturday, March 9, 2013

Weekend Writing Warriors: Rats, er, Bats


Welcome to Weekend Writing Warriors.  Today's excerpt comes from a yet unnamed WIP and is a continuation from last week.  My hero and heroine are stranded in the Amazon rain forest. When my heroine returns from answering nature's call, she saves my hero from being bitten by a bat.



Phaedra gave him as thorough an inspection as their puny fire permitted.  “I don’t think it bit you."
“I hope not.  It might be rabid, but more than likely it was just a healthy, hungry, vampire bat.  Still, bats can give you some nasty diseases if they bite you.”
“A vampire bat!  Where the hell are we: Transylvania?”
He had the nerve to laugh at her even though he quickly brought himself under control. 
In case you wanted to know, vampire bats are only about seven inches long even with their wings unfurled. They do have scary faces and drink blood.


28 comments:

Clare Davidson said...

Again, I love how you inject humour into the scene, even though they're in a dangerous situation. Looks like at least one of them is clued up about their surroundings.

charmainegordon author said...

Elaine, this is terrific with a great description, scary situation and a good laugh!

Botanist said...

Awww! Cute :) But it's true, the last thing they need is to catch some disease in this situation.

S. J. Maylee said...

Love his reaction, quick to laugh, but then concern settles in. Great snippet.

Melinda Dozier said...

Will this be a vampire story?

Glad they have each other's back. :)

Sue Ann Bowling said...

Sounds like he knows a lot more about the Amazon jungle than she does. And vampire bats have nothing to do with vampires--unless its that kind of story.

Ann Swann said...

I love the image of them trying to examine the bite by the firelight. Very nice!

The Original Drama Mama said...

Oooh, I love the name Phaedra! And yes, despite the scary name, they aren't so intimidating in real life...just creepy...as rats with wings and fangs would be. ;)

Debbie Doglady said...

Quite the dilemma and I enjoyed the bit of humour, as well. Phaedra is a wonderful name!

Virginia Kelly said...

Eww on the bat. They're really ugly. Hopefully there will be no problems because of this. It's bad enough that they're treeing through jungle. Great snippet!

Jenna said...

Love the use of the name Phaedre. I'd be freaked out in the jungle with bats--vampire or otherwise. Great way to promote togetherness! Great 8!

Virginia Kelly said...

That should have been trekking, not treeing. Sorry!

Veronica Scott said...

Unusual setting, fascinating snippet. I liked their ease with each other. Excellent excerpt!

Monica Enderle Pierce said...

In Amazonia, the bats are on the lower scale of their potential problems. I hope he can retain that sense of humor, 'cause I suspect he's gonna need it!

Brenda Ashworth Barry said...

This was very cute and funny. Made me laugh. But they should be careful from the bat, never know when it might bite. :-) Loved it!

D'Ann said...

Great job. I loved the humor. I love stories in the jungle!

Kate said...

This takes me back to my oldest's 3rd grade presentation on bats. Transylvania! LOL Beware Batula!

karen Y. bynum said...

Loved the humor and the fact that she saved him from a bat after doing her business. LOL Great 8! :D

Joanne Stewart said...

Call me weird, but I adore bats, of all kinds. Cute snippet!

The Belle in Blue said...

Great exchange between the characters, and is does take nerve to laugh at someone after they just saved you from being bitten by a bat! Great snippet!

~Joyce Scarbrough

Teresa Cypher said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Paula Martin said...

Great snippet - and I certainly wouldn't want to meet one of those bats!

Sarah W said...

I love the characters' different reactions---they really showcase their differences.

Teresa Cypher said...

Ugh! I'll try this again, with my brain engaged, :-)

“A vampire bat! Where the hell are we: Transylvania?” You did a great job of injecting humor in an otherwise tense situation. :-)

And what a great story! :-)

Siobhan Muir said...

Fun snippet, Elaine. :)

gemma parkes said...

I'm glad he brought himself under control, we women don't like to be laughed at! Great snippet!

kelworthfiles said...

Yeah, a fun bit. I don't think you'll find vampire bats anywhere near Transylvania.

Thanks for sharing

Sarah Ballance said...

*shudders* I've always though the bats (not vampires) flying around here at night were cool, but I think I just changed my mind. Yick! LOL.