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Friday, April 19, 2013

Sweet Saturday Sample: I've Got Worries Whoa-Oh

Hello, and welcome to Sweet Saturday Sample. My excerpt is from the same manuscript I've been sharing with you the last couple of weeks. This is from the opening scene of the book when my hero and heroine meet for the first time. Caroline arrives at her Uncle Bill's house to find that Uncle Bill died last Sunday in a car accident. Wes-my hero-is there to greet her. Caroline speaks first. Dylan is Caroline's son.

“Uncle Bill invited Dylan and me to live with him.  I was going to be his housekeeper.”

“There’s no work for you here.  Uncle Bill left this house to me.  It’s small, and I don’t need a housekeeper.”

Animation drained from Caroline's face.  “I…I’m sorry about Uncle Bill.  I wish I could have seen him once more before the end.”

“I’m sure he’d have enjoyed visiting with you.  Now, if you’ll excuse me I have some work I need to do.”

Caroline faced him with a curious blend of desperation, pride, and shame.  “I spent every penny I had getting here.  I don’t have any money for food much less a hotel room.  I was so counting on Uncle Bill.”

Dylan, who’d been sitting quietly on the rug in front of the fire, jumped up and put his arms around Caroline.  “It’s okay, Mama.  I’m not really hungry tonight, and we can sleep in the car again.”

A faint flush spread across the woman’s face.  “We can sleep in the car, but Dylan needs to eat.  If you could see your way clear to loaning me a few dollars, I’d pay you back.”

A particularly vicious gust of wind buffeted the house and whistled around the corner.  Dylan, who was small and pale, shivered when he heard it.  A tired, defeated expression pasted itself on Caroline’s face.

“I wouldn’t put a dog out on a night like this,” Wes gruffly answered.  “You can stay here until morning.”


Creations by Laurel-Rain Snow said...

Oh, what a predicament! Can't wait to see what happens next.

Thanks for visiting my blog.

Anonymous said...

Wes wasn't real inviting, but maybe something will work out for Caroline. :)

Sarah said...

Hmmm...somehow I think a night might turn into more. Great abrasive start between them.

heather Gray said...

Pulled me right in. I didn't want the sample to end. Already in love with the little boy. :)

Jenna said...

Hero or anti-hero? Wes is not in my good graces yet. A little too prickly toward the poor woman. I hope she finds a way to soften him up. Great sample. Really drew me in!

Lindsay said...

I'd love to slap Wes, he's such an idiot

jeff7salter said...

wow. powerful scene, and very economically written.
Great stuff.

Carrie-Anne said...

That's a really difficult place to be in. It made me think of the perceptions project I just did in my Children's Lit class, when my group read about homelessness. I hope there's a happy ending for them.